January 2012
My little nephew omg okay I haven’t seen him since he couldn’t speak and he ran past everyone and hugged me and said “I love your dress, you look like a PRINCESS!” and I almost cried omg
god, i’m so charming
who wants to date me
don’t be shy
i don’t have to know you
i sleep
it’s how i avoid dealing with things that bother me
single on new year’s eve? go to bed early
favorite band having a concert and can’t go? go to bed early
dad coming over to your house on new year’s eve while you lament the fact that you can’t go to your favorite band’s concert in philadelphia in march? go the fuck to sleep
i think my mom is finally accepting that i know what swear words are and that i use them
often
December 2011
what
this one guy in my grade accidentally added me to his “new phone, i need your numbers” thing on Facebook
i know it’s an accident, because i haven’t spoken to him in like three years and i don’t think he ever even considered us friends
he told me i was abnormally sarcastic all the time the last time we spoke in like ninth grade
pretty sure he never had my...
no one on facebook gets my jokes
i know that has to be it, because i’m absolutely hilarious and no one ever tells me
4 tags
1 tag
lol some people got invited to new years eve parties
4 tags
1 tag
I’m being completely serious when I admit that my ideal date involves a huge used book store and as much silence as can be had comfortably
I am singing Elton John sadly while I sit on my bed looking contemplative
I should do movies
I graduate in six months
what
1 tag
Nope
That settles it
I’m taking a double dose of Nyquil at 10:30 and that’ll be my night
1 tag
2 tags
1 tag
1 tag
i’m convinced that if I were to take e, the only difference would be that everything would sound like coldplay
2 tags
“I’m going to opium dens! Yes, opium dens, dens of vice and...”
– Tom (The Glass Menagerie - Tennessee Williams)
1 tag
No, please don’t respond to me
I only asked you a question that is integral to the continuation of our friendship
By all means, ignore it
I don’t even know what language this movie is in, but it is absolutely enchanting me
Cherry Chapstick is legitimately the best thing I’ve ever smelled in my entire life
1 tag
3 tags
I saw Rooney Mara naked
And it was awesome
2 tags
3 tags
one time i thought about the fact that in my lifetime i would have to see robin williams and stephen hawking die
and i cried
2 tags
i feel like i should own more velvet tracksuits
I just looked up and didn’t realize where I was or how I got here
I’ve not slept in two days
1 tag
h0ckeymom:
i secretly like getting assigned seats in school because it takes takes away that awkward “i have no friends in this class where the fuck am i gonna sit” factor
THEY LOOKED AT MY TUMBLR I’M RUINED
WHAT IF THEY SEE ALL MY PORN
People are coming to my house and we all have to use my laptop
RED ALERT
2 tags
1 tag
1 tag
God, it’s ridiculous how much I love Newsies
2 tags
“Anxiety is love’s greatest killer. It makes others feel as you might when a...”
– Anaïs Nin (via celestialobjects)
1 tag
3 tags
1 tag
1 tag
Someday I’ll make t-shirts with all my wittiest text posts written on them
2 tags
10 tags
One time I was at a murder mystery party and my character had no interaction with my one friend’s character, but I pretended that my character hated her character so I could point out all of my friend’s personality flaws without her getting mad
2 tags
Every time I hear a plane, I’m convinced it’s going to crash into my house